Drivin' a Truck
by MinibooExtreme
Summary: Alex with half the other boys, has been coaxed into singing at his leavers assembly for year eleven over a year after snake head. K unit are also there to witness the boys humiliation.


Disclaimer: I don't won Alex Rider of the song which is: truck drivin' by Weird Al Yankovic

* * *

Alex had now been back at school for a over a year and now was sixteen. Today was his last day of school and the year elevens were having there leaving ceremony.

Snake had been bullied into going to his little brothers leavers assembly at Brookland school. Something about how it always gets out of control and they didn't want to have to be paying another couple of thousand for repairs this time round. He had however managed to convince Wolf, Eagle, Lion and Fox into joining him. Lion had joined K Unit when Fox left to work for M16.

Alex still didn't know how half of the boys had been coaxed into doing this. He wasn't even sure how he was coaxed into this. Maybe it was because he was finally excepted again. True to their word M16 had left him alone. It was too late to back out of this. He knew that the other guys where as nervous as him.

"Another Year has come and gone and now it is time for you to go out into the world. I will worn you now we have some SAS here this year to keep you under control. I don't want a repeat of past years," Mr Bray started, "Now I am sure that you are wondering why half the boys are missing. Well without further ado I present the opening act."

The song started playing:

I'm drivin' a truck  
Drivin' a big ol' truck  
Pedal to the metal, hope I don't run out of luck  
Rollin' down the highway until the break of dawn  
Drivin' a truck with my high heels on

Alex and some of the other boys came out onto the stage. All of them wearing high heels. In the background Alex saw K Unit and groaned under his breath.

My diesel rig is northward bound  
It's time to put that hammer down  
Just watchin' as the miles go flyin' by  
I'm ridin' twenty tons of steel  
But it's sure hard to hold the wheel  
While I'm waiting for my nails to dry

Some more boys came out this time showing of there hands which had nail polish on. Some of the girls in the audience started wolf whistling.

Oh, I always gotta check my lipstick  
in that rear view mirror  
And my pink angora sweater fits so tight  
I'm jammin' gears and haulin' freight  
Well, I sure hope my seams are straight  
Lord, don't let my mascara run tonight

Yet more of the boys came out, this time with make up on and in tights under shorts. They were wearing pink jackets which they had borrowed from their girlfriends.

Because I'm drivin' a truck  
Drivin' a big ol' truck  
Smokey's on my tail and my accelerator's stuck  
Got these eighteen wheels-a-rollin'  
until the break of dawn  
Drivin' a truck with my high heels on

By now the hall was in laughter. Even Wolf was cracking a smile while the boys made fools out of themselves. The boys were now singing along with hair brushes, hair straighteners, blush brushes and curlers as 'microphones' which they had taken from the back of the stage.

Oh, I don't mind when my crotchless  
panties creep right up on me  
And my nipple rings don't bother me too much  
But when I hit those big speed bumps  
My darling little rhinestone pumps  
Keep slippin' off the mother-lovin' clutch

All the boys took off there shirts revealing fake nipple piercings and revealed the tops of frilly knickers.

But still I'm drivin' a truck  
Drivin' a big ol' truck  
Headin' down the interstate, just tryin' to make a buck  
Wearin' feather boas with sequins and chiffon  
While I'm drivin' a truck with my high heels on

Half the boys on the stage put on waist coats with feathers on them while the others put on waist coats with sequins on. A couple of them, including Alex managed to wink at the audience of which by know where crying tears of laughter. Some had even fallen off their chairs. K Unit where all wearing smirks and Alex had a feeling that they where somehow going to meet up with him and never let him forget this.

I'm drivin' a truck  
Drivin' a truck  
Got a load to carry and some eyebrows left to pluck  
And I'm late for my appointment down at my hair salon  
So I'll be drivin' a truck with my high heels on

As the song ended the boys through themselves onto to their knees, hands in the air and grinning like fools.

"Well that certainly was unexpected." Mr Bray told the students as the boys rushed off to get changed.

When they came back wearing their real clothes the hall erupted into applause.

The assembly had now finished and K Unit had managed to corner Alex before he left.

"A truck driver, Cub?" Wolf asked, still grinning.

"Are you questioning you sexuality?" Fox carried on.

"What are you doing here any way?" Alex asked trying to change the subject.

"Oh my little bro is in your year and begged me to come." Snake told him.

"Some how, event thought we don't see each other I have a feeling i'm never going to live this down." Alex moaned.

"Nope," Eagle grinned, "I caught it all on camera." He finished showing Alex a camcorder .


End file.
